From: "Daniel C. L'Hommedieu" <dcl@clearlight.com> Date: Mon, 28 Oct 1996 07:28:19 -0500 (EST) | Secret Debate Transcripts | By Nora Cody | | Transcript of the 3rd debate between President Clinton and Senator Dole | (held in secret and never before released to the public) | | Question: "What can you do about the rain? I live in Seattle and it | rained | way too much last year." | | Clinton: "What's your name, dear?" | | Questioner: "Jeannette" | | Clinton: "Well, Jeannette, I'm glad you asked that question. Last | year, | rainfall on average was down 3%. In Seattle, it rained 6.5% less than the | previous year. If you'll give me four more years, we can bring it down | some | more. | | "Under George Bush, both rain and snow increased nationwide. Newt | Gingrich | and Bob Dole proposed extensive cuts in my weather management program -- | cuts that would have left families like yours paddling through floodwaters | and slogging through snow. We have a plan to not only reduce rain, but to | attack the persistent problems of sleet and hail as well. If you'll give | me | a chance, we can join hands and stroll across a sunny bridge to the 21st | century. Thank you." | | Dole: "There he goes again, Jeannette. Taking credit for the | weather! | That's just like that other thing -- last year, during the Congressional | session -- wanted to grab credit for that plan we were pushing . . . Well, | anyway, let me tell you what I'll do about the rain. | | We've got a tax plan that will result in real changes in your life. Tax | credits to those companies that seed the clouds will bring about a real | boost in rainfall where we really need it, like in Russell Kansas. I'm | from | Russell, Kansas. When I was a boy, there was no rain. We ate dust for | breakfast. Didn't mind, still don't. There was a time I couldn't even | get | myself dressed in the morning. I got over that, and you can too." | | Next question: "I want the new Nintendo for Christmas, and my Dad told me | that the store is already sold out. But I want | it! I want Nintendo!!" | | Dole: "Young man, how old are you?" | | Questioner: "Six." | | Dole: "Well, youngsters such as this fellow often make good | points. Points | about our great American capitalist system. Unfortunately, under | President | Clinton and his democratic cronies our competitiveness in the electronics | and toy industries has greatly declined. Do you think those Japanese kids | have trouble getting Nintendo at Christmas time? No sir. | | "Let me tell you a story. When I was a boy, we didn't even have | television. | Instead, I worked hard in the fields. In Russell, Kansas, where I was | raised. We would have been happy with an orange for Christmas. Today's | children need to appreciate what they have." | | Clinton: "What's your name, son?" | | Questioner: "Zachary." | | Clinton: "Zachary, I feel your pain and frustation. Why (chuckles) | I still | remember my joy at finding that Radio Flyer wagon under the Christmas tree | when I was six years old. You should get your Nintendo. In fact, every | young person in America who wants Nintendo should have it, along with | access | to the Internet. If we don't get these kids logged on to the information | highway of the 21st century, we're doing them a grave disservice. If | you'll | give me four more years, Zachary, I'll make sure that every child has all | the technology they want." | | At this point the debate was forced to an early conclusion as Clinton and | Dole simultaneously rushed to hug/shake hands with (respectively) Zachary, | knocking one another to the ground in the process. -- Daniel C. L'Hommedieu dcl@clearlight.com http://www.clearlight.com/~dcl
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